"How to meditate"

That was the title of a small ad I saw in the back of a comic book in 1970.

For just one dollar, the ad promised, I can learn how to meditate.  "Discover the secrets of ancient yogi masters, control my mind, and achieve psychic powers."  A step-by-step course to  learn to meditate like a monk was only four quarters away. I couldn't wait.

But in 1970.  I was eight years old and a dollar was a lot of money, even if learning how to meditate was going to give me the psychic powers I could use to control Jimmy Audia, the kid who used throw snowballs at me until I found refuge in my house.

So I polished my dad's shoes.  He gave me $.10 for each pair.  I think he noticed that I polished the same pair a few times, but he still gave me $.10 each time.  And in a couple of weeks I had enough I sent away for my "how to" meditation course.

Like most things advertised in the back of a comic book, the real thing is not quite as good as the ad (or what happens in the imagination after reading the ad) and this Learn To Meditate program was no different.  Or so I thought.

It was basically a two-page Xeroxed piece of paper with the following instructions:

Find a quiet space somewhere your home and sit down in a chair or on the floor with your back straight and your eyes gently closed.  Pay attention to your breathing. Notice when you breathe in, and when you breathe out.  As you breathe in, in your mind, say the word "In," and as you breathe out, in your mind, say the word, "Out."  Continue this practice every day for 20 minutes each day, and soon you'll discover the secrets of ancient meditation masters, and you'll be able to control your mind and start noticing psychic phenomenon.

Like many of the things I bought from the back of the comic book.  I set this aside, even if it worked.  I thought it seemed like much too much effort, especially for an eight-year-old.

Ironically, once I began a serious meditation practice a few years later, this was practically the exact instruction given to me by the seventy year-old Indian teacher.  And now that meditation has become more popular and familiar you'll find this exact instruction in dozens of how to meditate books at bookstores.

And if you go on a meditation retreat, you'll usually hear some variation of the same meditation instruction.

That's not to say this is the only way to meditate.  My thought is that 20 minutes a day for months — or years — at a time is too much time to wait for results.

Always the efficiency geek, I ended up developing simpler practices that produce dramatic results in a very small amount time.  But that's a story for another article.  Until then, you just learned everything you need to know for how to meditate… and maybe develop psychic powers.

BTW, even though I didn't develop secret mind control power, after we both found ourselves on the gymnastics team a few years later, Jimmy and I became best friends.

Next Post: How To: Meditation Guide

Please help. Bookmark, share, email or favorite this page. Use this button to begin: